When I met Nisreen, one of the first things she told me about was her dream of travelling to New Zealand. When we started dating, she warned me that this trip was a promise she made to herself and she was going to do it no matter what. More on that here. I understood her urge to travel as I have backpacked my way through Canada twice, traveled through parts of Europe and lived on an Island in the Bahamas. There is something special about long-term travel that a week in an all-inclusive just can’t bring you.That being said, I had mixed emotions about a year-long trip with Nisreen. After all, she’s  lived in big cities all her life and has been living the corporate life for over a decade. I felt that reality would hit her much harder than on a countryside boy. After much thought I realized that this is the woman of my dream. She is everything I always wanted and I knew she is willing to learn and make compromises. So I couldn’t just say no. Although, I needed to reassure myself that she could handle it (and handle me) in a confined space, outside our comfort zone and in a new and stressful environment.  Luckily in May, we had the perfect opportunity! One of her good ol friend invited us for her wedding in Atlanta Georgia. It was an Indian wedding so it lasted almost a week. It had several ceremonies and rituals and family and friends had to help to make sure everything goes smoothly. Oh, by the way, this was the first time I was ever attending a wedding, let alone an Indian one. I still can’t believe the experience it was! More on that later.

Normally, people would consider flying from Montreal to Atlanta. That is what everyone else coming from Montreal did. But not us, we decided to make a road trip out of it. We figured it would be a great opportunity to test our love and patience. We decided to split the organisation of the trip in half and see the results. We learned that we work better as a team and that mindfulness was our best friend. We are blessed that we have good communication skills and that we both consistently try to improve ourselves in this area. We have been able to overcome all kinds of challenges that came our way and our relationship just got stronger. Here are my top 5 things to keep in mind when travelling with a loved one.

1-  Be mindful of your other half’s level of energy, their strength and their weaknesses. We drove a great deal. From Montreal to Boston, then Boston to Savannah, then Savannah to Atlanta and then Atlanta straight to Montreal. You can imagine that one gets really tired. Nisreen can drive 4 hours straight without blinking. I can drive maybe 2hours. She hates driving at night while I don’t mind. So we alternated driving, stopped when we each needed it. And when at destination, we were mindful of each other’s energy level  and mood. She knew that I needed to be fed or I turn into the Hulk and I knew that I couldn’t be teasing her past 7pm.

2- Clarify, clarify and clarify -Never assume. Sometimes people forget to do things, even if they do it all the time. Sometimes people are on the ball with things and they just suck at them when travelling. It’s a different stress, a different reality and it’s okay.

3- Take some time apart. Although for us it can be to spend 30 minutes without talking to each others while being in the same room, sometimes people need to go explore on their own for a day or 2.

4- Value quality time together.  You spend all your days and nights together. You will wake up, eat, walk, sleep and  maybe even shower together. You will go through stressful events together. Just like when being at home, it’s important to understand the value of time together. For example, when we got to Savannah. I had the feeling we started to get exhausted and that Boston didn’t quite deliver what we expected from it. We are both foodies and when the food is not up to our expectations, it was a disappointment to say the least. So I proposed we go for a good meal, like a no holding back on expenses good meal. We looked  up multiple spots, fought a little about it and then decided on the Olde Pink House. This was the highlight of our trip! As we sat down in the most romantic seat in the hotel, the pressure simply melted off and we were able to get through the rest of the trip without damage and have actually come out stronger. We understand each others needs or at least we try and that makes all the difference.

5- Love each other It sounds weird and maybe to obvious but LOVE EACH OTHER. Not in the “be in love” sense, but rather in the sense of combining point 1 and 4 together. Be mindful of allowing quality moments to happen. I was watching this interview where this guy was explaining the 5 love languages of Gary Chapman. “People need different kinds of love”. Some things matter more for people than others. Keeping this in mind and giving the kind of love that your partner needs is one of the keys to a successful relationship. I am happy we had a great time and that we passed the “Test”. We clarified things about ourselves and the relationship while we were away. We didn’t kill each other and in fact our relationship got stronger. Now, we are preparing our move and the Oceania and Asia trip.

PS: I was thinking of posting the cost breakdown of our trip because I know that I am always looking for that kind of stuff when I plan a trip. Let us know in the comments below and I will post about it.